John 14:16-17

"I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever; that is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you."

Let it be to me according to your word.

its those people we read about in the news who express all their thoughts and emotions through outlets like this because they have no one to really listen. its those people who get lost in their own craziness that they do the most outrageous, unthinkable acts of immorality. i always wondered why, but im slowly understanding why. they were just in need. the world is in need. a bigger need than most people believe. those that dont believe in this need are just lying to themselves. itll be a sad realization for them one day when they are barely afloat. their minds will lost in left field and their hearts will be rotten to the core. they will wish that they could live in the past. but thus is life. it is a culmination and spiraling of man's brokenness fed by man's attempt to control it. we are all spiraling out of control. lost in this so-called life that we once believed would set us free. how foolish we are. how childish to believe that. ideal and reality are opposites, yet we imagine them as complements. stupid. what you know isnt something you can escape. but it can drown you. sucks. stay afloat a bit longer. or until your will is unwilling.

7.22.13

Today was a letdown. I don't even have the words to explain it.

Transformation

"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize."

1 Corinthians 9:24-27

Discipline. Transformation. Renewal

Community

I've tasted the richness of community. I've tasted the emptiness of community. If you say that your community is life-giving, soul-fulfilling, eternal satisfaction..then I am looking forward to it. Be my desire.

5.11.13

this life is so fleeting. it's filled with many disappointments. many things that disappoint. many people who disappoint. there is no satisfaction. it's a fallacy that this earth tries to convene. the people who you spend the most time with will forget who you are. in the end, you die alone. in the end, you dont really know where your soul goes. life is a big mystery. maybe for a reason, but regardless, it'll disappoint. tired of this nonsense.

4.15.13

In the wake of tragedy, many seem to lose their hope in humanity. But in the wake of tragedy, I am hopeful that many more will find their hope in humanity's savior. May the saving grace be ever-present

Romans 1:16-17

It is God's power that saves, not ours. That is why Paul is not ashamed of the Gospel. Because he knows he does not have the deciding power. It is up to God and out of his hands. How can you be ashamed of something that does not belong to you? You can't. You don't hear people ashamed of someone else's actions. It does not belong to them. Nor does someone's salvation belong to us. We are mere tools in His ever-vast shed. So we must be as tools are to be - used when need be. I must not confuse myself with the carpenter.

Romans 1:1-15

Back to daily devo scripture blog. May God's truth transform and renew my soul. Let's go with Epistles. Gotta love that guy, Paul. A new man with a clear and passionate calling ("set apart for the gospel of God" (v 1)). In a sense we are all. Chosen to be God's hands and feet. May we proclaim grace and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. It's very encouraging to read Paul's enthusiasm in his letters. They are always of him wanting bold things for people. Wanting to jump in and fight alongside them, but always restricted by physical distances. What would it look like if the church body was constantly encouraging each other in that way? Then physical distances don't really seem that big. When do we ever want to impart spiritual gifts? Hardly. We just say everyone has different gifts, used in different ways. I think we should start imparting these gifts for others. Capabilities seem plausible. The impact could be greater than we could imagine. Excited to see how these letters can spur my life and the church body I know today.

Jonah

I am remind of Jonah, the prophet who once was used to bring good news of reconciliation only to a man running scared of the truth known as Yahweh. In some ways I feel his anxiety and internal strife. No, I wasn't called to love the people that I hated the most. I was called to love the people who were making me hate them only because I really wanted to love them. Oh the irony. Yet, my selfish pride ran with that hate and I eventually started to run from God himself. Oh the tragic.

Seems like I'm still running. May the sovereignty of the God of the universe reign supreme. Draw me back.

In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

Who, being in very nature God,

did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;

rather, he made himself nothing

by taking the very nature of a servant,

being made in human likeness.

And being found in appearance as a man, 

he humbled himself

be becoming obedient to death --

even death on a cross!

Therefore God exalted him to the highest place

and gave him the name that is above every name,

that at the name of Jesus every knee show bow,

in heaven and on earth and under the earth,

and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,

to the glory of God the Father.

Philippians 2:5-11

Onward

Before I could ever ask someone for forgiveness, I need to forgive myself.

I forgive you. Now let's move on and learn how to be a better man of God.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.

January 2013

God, I know I'll look back on this month and know just how good you are to me. Just get me to February.

Boom. 2012.

It's been one week of 2013 and yet I'm still floored at how God has provided a hundred-fold for me in 2012. I know I couldn't do Him justice, but I hope to highlight some great moments in 2012 and maybe one day when I looked back at my 20's, I'll see how fortunate I was in 2012 to be blessed by a God who gives relentless.

2012 was:

-My first full year of work. I don't think I was ever super excited about work when I was in college. I always thought it was a means to a end. It was a place to develop your character and skillset and make some money to live. Yet, throughout 2012, I kept questioning God why I am an accountant. (To be honest, I still do...lucky me). But I don't think God ever answered that question. He wasn't keen on that question. He cared more about me relying on Him to endure the toils of worklife. Work is tough. It can be relaxing and joyous, but it is mainly tough and taxing. Yet through it all, work in 2012 was a blessing. I was able to engage in some spiritual conversations during my busiest of seasons. I was fortunate to work on an engagement with a great senior and coworkers. And even though it was out-of-town, it was still close to home and Austin. I was blessed with opportunities to see my friends and family there. I was able to enjoy the fullness of a flexible schedule, not-so heavy hours, and the perks of traveling. For all the moaning I do about work, I had it easy in 2012. I'm super fortunate. I got a decent raise. I didn't travel to deserted cities like others. I didn't have to log long hours on the weekends like others. I didn't get fired like others. Thank you God for showing me mercy during my first full year. May my moaning be shouts of praise in 2013.
-Trying times with family, yet hearts are being mended. 2012 was by far the hardest year in dealing with my family. May I never ever forget the pain and hurt of broken relationships this past year. May I never forget the amount of tears shed over the bitterness and hate I had in my heart. May I never forget my deepest desires to turn my back on my family. Only then will I truly cherish the grandeur of God's grace. I do not deserve this family to begin with. My year alone would have been sufficient for thousands of people who deal with the brokenness of family for their entire lives. I count it a blessing to hurt and hate. For only then do I realize that sweet tastes of reconciliation and mended hearts. God is still working in my heart. That is truth. I am thankful for my mother who put up with my moaning and whining all year. Who sacrificially provided food and shelter to my impatient, selfish attitude. For being always naggy and invasive of my personal space because she cared. I know 2013 will be different without her. Her optimistic attitude of forgiveness and perseverance is something worth being praised about. She has suffered much for our family. I will always remember the fight in her. I hope I find a girl who fights for her family like my mother. A true trooper. A true warrior of faith. Thank you, God for blessing me with a mother like this.
-Biblical community like no other. I am astonished to see God's fruit in biblical community in 2012 at DCFC. I came back home with no expectations. None. I wasn't even sure I would stick around. I'm glad the youth group was always something that kept me connected to the church during high school and college. I'm thankful for the perseverance of my brothers and sisters who stuck around at DCFC for years while community seemed to be dying away. God has definitely rewarded (if not, more abundantly in the future) them in the fruits of their labor. I blows my mind that a simple workout can turn into prayer, then into spiritual discussion, then into a group for encouragement and sharpening, then into church models, then into community groups. All of this happening in a span of a little over a year. *MIND BLOWN* To say that God has great power to transform people and situation would be an understatement. The Spirit was definitely moving in 2012. The Spirit was not only moving, it was hopping. I cannot count how many times I was blessed with meaningful conversations, meaningful prayers, meaningful rebukings, meaningful encounters with the triune God. I would have never guessed that 1 year out of college would be the biggest year for spiritual transformation in my life. Granted it wasn't all cupcakes and sprinkles, but God transformed the way I read the Bible, the way I prayed, the way I encouraged. He reminded me that service was not for myself, but for Him alone. He showed me how biblical communities change and struggle, but His Word remains the same. He showed me the passion of my brothers and sisters and how they can impact how you see the world and the people in it. He showed me that life would be utterly useless with biblical community. The world could not satisfy my weekends. I could only eat so many meals. I could only watch so much sports. I could only sleep so much. Community was life for me and it gave me meaning. Though physically my body would hurt from my lack of sleep, I experienced some of the greatest memories with my church community. Late nights after youth group. Underball. Late night meals. Celebrating birthdays. Running Firefly together. Eating more meals. Intense prayer time. Many parties and goofing around. More eating meals. Worshipping together. Serving together. Living life together.

Okay, those were the main aspects of my life. Other things I want to remember in 2012.
-working out consistently! get big baby!
-driving ranges on Saturdays
-DCCYC
-hockey games
-baseball games
-new nephew Jacob!
-nephew Tyler growing to be a G
-july 4th bbq
-church retreats!
-triple threat softball
-gymclassallstars
-smartphone s3
-best birthday weekend ever. ever. ever.
-vacations to Cali and Chicago with great brothers
-attending 2 spectacular weddings - Andy & Cynthia and Ben & Christine
-most karaoke in my life
-the book of Acts, Romans, and James
-parable of the sower
-my bucket list
-more to come as i continue to reflect

Great year but definitely ready for 2013. Dreaming big.