Mark 12:1-12

The parable of the tenants. I've read this story a few times, but it hasn't been a memorable one so reading it tonight was a nice realization to who God is and who man is. At first read, I wasn't sure how the parable was going to end so when I read how the people would beat and kill the servants who were sent, I was taken aback. Then when the owner sent his beloved son, they disrespected and murdered him not the reason like the ones sent before him, but so they could take his inheritance. And thus the connection was made. Of course we are the tenants. We live off the land that is not ours. We did not create it, we do not own it, we really don't even deserve it. Yet for some reason, we feel like we have this ownership and authority to rule over it. I think that can mean a lot of things in life: family, friends, house, money, jobs, breathe of life..I dunno...anything and everything. I'm glad Jesus used parables to teach the people. Its nice to establish a connection with something meaningful than have someone shove something down your throat. I guess that's why we are preaching towards building a meaningful relationship with someone first than just reciting the Gospel. As I continue to wrestle with what the Gospel looks like in my life, I am thankful that the Word of God continually shows me good examples of how to be like Christ. I do hope I can be more consistent with living with a repentant and convicted heart. I need to remember how not to be a tenant of the vineyard, but rather a servant to the Master.

Mark 11:27-33

Another day, another great lesson from God. It's always good to reflect on foundation of your beliefs. It's always good to wrestle with the underlining identity to what you believe in. I thank the Lord for tonight's discussion on faith. I've always just accepted it and rarely do I sit and just think about why my faith is so real. Or what makes my faith who I am. Sounds counter intuitive to someone who calls himself a Christian, right? Well yeah..right. But I'm glad I got to really hear how other people's faith shapes who they are. It gave me a greater appreciation of just how complex God made this world and how intricate each person's mind really is. Faith looks different for a lot of people. To me, it's knowing that God will prevail. It's knowing that there is a God and a God who does love this world and the people he created. However screwed up this world is and how much "evidence" that God couldn't possibly exist or what not...well I have faith that there will be a day where I can share in the same joy Jesus does when he worships the Father in Heaven. That sounds pretty great to me. That is something that I look forward too. That faith drives me to desire God. That faith helps shape how I think and how I encourage others. It's not by seeing...it's by believing that something so unreal can be so real. Now that's unreal. I don't know if this passage has anything to do with faith...well I'm sure it doesn't, but my heart was on this matter so I couldn't waste a chance to share. The passage does show a pretty cool-guy aspect of Christ. Christ knew His calling. He was obedient to it and wanted everyone to know. But you know how I know Jesus was a cool guy? Bc he's like the smart teacher at school who doesn't just give you the shortcuts and answers to the problems. He drops hints and reminders so you discover the true beauty of knowledge and wisdom. And then you're able to recognize that that teacher actually taught you something. Jesus didn't need to tell all the high priests and scribes what every little thing in life was, or who gave him authority, etc, etc. He invited them along for the ride so they could experience the beauty of truth and redemption. Yeah, that's the kind of guy I'd like to follow.

Mark 11:12-26

Recent weeks have been a struggle of highs and lows. I think tonight was one of those low nights...feeling just meh and out of it as I struggle with my sinful desires. But I thank God that I was able to get away from slothfulness and turn to the Word. And well..He spoke...and spoke pretty clear.

Jesus is traveling and comes across a fig tree that is not producing fruit so He curses it. Seems kinda trivial but of course, there's something deeper. Gotta be, right? He goes on to clear the temples from people who are doing business instead of worship there. Next thing you know, the group comes back to the fig tree that has withered. At first I just assumed...well the tree wasn't producing fruit so it had to die. I guess that's me..who should be producing fruit or letting God produce the fruit through me. And if I don't, then I deserve death? I wasn't too sure and wasn't really getting much until I researched. Came across a site that reference the unproductive fig tree to Luke 13:1-8 where Jesus tells a parable of a fig tree that's been tended to for years and yet does not produce. The vineyard keeper is like "wait 1 more year. I PROMISE!" and then I read the little subtitle..."repent or perish". Well there it is...how clear it is now. I am that fig tree. Yes I got that right. But it's not really producing fruit as in making disciples per se...it's producing fruit as in...repent of your sin so that you might even be seen as a fig tree capable of producing fruit. A fitting end to a night where I just feel all my inadequacies lining up. How can I stop making promises to God and start making strides to Him instead? I don't want to be the one that makes these excuses each year to start being ripe for the Gospel. I need to stop being a fraud.

Mark 10:46-11:11

I take a lot of things for granted. We all do. It's quite a sad fact of life. Everyone will admit it (and those who don't are just foolish). But what if...we lost it all. The physical blessings that we have. Any of the 5 senses. Anything that didn't make us normal. Then we would have faith like those found in the Bible? These people were outcasts. They were ridiculed, rebuked, looked down upon just bc they weren't normal. What else were they to do but to have faith in the man who performs miracles. Praise the Father for sending His Son. Praise the Son for reconciling man from their brokenness. It shouldn't take a man without sight to believe there is a Savior. But maybe for some of us it does. Though I am blessed with the gift of sight, Father please let me have the faith of one without.

Mark 10:32-39

This one hits home a little bit. First Jesus foretells his death a third time (v 32-34). Seems simple enough until he describes how it happens. Mocking. Spitting. Flogging. I think about some of the most disrespectful and obscene things that could happen to anyone. And the sad thing is that these people that do this...are just like me and you. A pity for me to think that I want to love this Jesus guy so much, yet I am the one who mocks his teaching, spits on him with doubt, and flog him when I am angry at him. Sad truth is truth nonetheless. I hope that I can better realize the pain I cause for my Savior and to repent from my mocking, spitting, and flogging. Let that be my prayer.

2nd part is what breaks me. James and John want to be at the right and left hand of Jesus to bask in His glory. Jesus asks a simple question.."are you able to drink the cup that I drink or to be baptized with the baptism with which I am baptized." He goes on to talk about how God is that one that prepares these things. God is one who will call us to be with Him in glory. We are mere humans. We don't reserve that spot. He does. It's a pity to look back 5 years ago when I got baptized. A time where I needed God the most. A time where I really believed that my proclamation would be life-changing. It has no doubt..but I still see the same me and it saddens me. A proclamation is no good if it is short-lived. I don't want the rest of my life to be just a relapse of judgment and faith. May the Spirit propel me to a renewed faith, a serious one where Jesus is more than sufficient. Please be my everything.

Mark 10:17-31

Story bout the man with tons of wealth asking Jesus what he needs to do to inherit eternal life. Jesus knows that this man has done a lot that exemplify being a believer in God (following the commandments and such). Yet, Jesus also knows his heart loves money and it's an idol he can't give up. The man actually goes away sad bc he knows deep down inside that he couldn't give up this money for Christ. I think many see this story and kinda shake their heads bc the man seems so foolish about loving his possessions more than the God in flesh, Jesus Christ. I know I was shaking my head. But the more I think about it...it's pretty evident that I am that guy. And it might not be money or any type of material possession. It is easily things my heart longs after: pride, self-righteousness, lustful desires. These things have definitely been a struggle and held my heart captive many times in my life which make me walk around from Christ sadden. But it is reassuring that Jesus doesn't just leave it at that and go about His day. He actually goes and teaches His disciples that when man tries to do things, he is unable to. Rather God is able to. He goes on to promise that when we abandon these things for the sake of Jesus, there will be even greater riches we will receive. "Hundredfold." Take the most precious gift of life and multiply it by 100. That's a lot of preciousness. But Jesus makes another point very clear. There will be persecution (v30) so it won't be an easy journey. I have to keep reminding myself that. The journey is long and very tough. It will not be smooth. It will not be ideal. And it will be impossible if I depend on myself.

Mark 10:1-16

Jesus handles a question about divorce. Kinda outta left field, but well..Jesus is up to it of course. Jesus states it pretty clear that divorce is man-made and made from the deceit of man's heart. Actually he even says that it's from the "hardness" of the heart (v5) that man made this get-out-of-marriage certificate. But rather, just as God intended in the beginning that male and female should be one, Jesus reiterates that and says that "let not man separate". Kinda sad what society has made out of man-made laws and just from the stubbornness of our own hearts, we get what we want whenever we want. People consume this kind of culture bc it feels good and it feels right. Oh how mistaken we have become. We are so jaded in our own selves that we fail to realize God's commands. God lays it out pretty clearly in the beginning. And His hope was meant to just last some time...it was meant to last forever til the end of time (which never really ends..thats the kicker). So then how can I strive to stay faithful to God's command? First, I need to stay faithful to God. To desire Him. Pursue Him. To love Him and to receive His love and mercy. I know it sounds all Sunday Schoolish..but well, that's what I really need. I need to read more and ask for a heart like Jesus (go big or go home). And when I marry...well then I need to not only love someone, but to love with someone so we become one. To be one in loving God. To be one in loving others. Wow...seems like a tall task. But my prayer is that as God continues to mold me, He will show me how to do that. May my heart not be hardened to the ways of man, but may it be compelled to grasp the beauty and grace of a Father's love. I need to be like a child of God. To trust Him in everything and to be faithful that my Father will provide. (That's what Jesus pretty much says in v13-16). Santa got nothing on Jesus.

Mark 9:30-50

A couple of topics Jesus talks about with his disciples. First, that when we do things in Jesus' name, it should be done in faith. And when we do things in good faith, Jesus says we are for Him and not against Him. That being said...I think it's tough for me to do things in good faith or even mediocre faith. My pride gets in the way. Self-righteousness. Self-glorification. Just all the human natures of me. I hope as I continue to learn more about Jesus and His heart, then my heart will be transformed.

2nd point was about the temptations of sins and what it does. Jesus goes through a few figures (or literals maybe?) of examples of well if you hand/eye/etc causes you to stumble, then get rid of it bc it's better you're missing something while entering heaven then having a whole body entering hell. In the NASB version, they repeat "the worms won't die, and the fire is not quenched." I had to look that up and it brings a vivid imagine of Jesus' teaching.

I'll just copy/paste from a website...

The margins of some Bibles show that the words "hell fire" in Mark 9:47 should be translated "Gehenna fire." Gehenna, or the valley of Hinnom, is located outside Jerusalem. Trash, refuse, animal carcasses, and even the dead bodies of despised criminals were thrown there to be destroyed by the fires that burned perpetually on the valley floor. If some animal or vegetable matter fell on one of the ledges below the rim, escaping the fire, it would instead be devoured by maggots.

Jesus' point is that whatever was thrown into the valley never came out again; it was totally consumed, either by fire or by worms or maggots. In other words, just as nothing and no one exterminated the maggots or extinguished the flames in the valley of Gehenna, so there will be no escape from the certain fate that God has decreed for all unrepentant sinners—death in the "lake of fire" (Revelation 22:14).

credits: http://www.cgg.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Library.sr/CT/BQA/k/67/What-Does-Jesus-Mean-by-Their-Worm-Does-Not-Die-Mark-944-46-48.htm#ixzz1jsSjIE4c

Pretty freaking crazy.

Mark 9:30-37

Short passage today, but nonetheless good and thought-provoking. The disciples argue who is the greatest (among themselves) and Jesus says" if anyone would be first, he must be last of all and servant of all." I've heard this plenty of times...he who is first must also be last. I don't think I've really thought much of it besides..well just be accommodating to everyone else before you help yourself. I can do that. Serve first, eat later. Open the door, enter later. Be willing to get the lesser good "pieces" of whatever. But after reading this, I thought to myself...maybe Jesus is talking about the kingdom of God. If you want to enter, you better make sure everyone else enters before you. And that makes perfect sense, but here's the kicker...if I really want to be in heaven with the Father and enjoy the joy of worship and His glory, then EVERYONE has to be invited. So am I inviting everyone? Am I telling them there's a big party in Heaven and EVERYONE is invited? I don't think so. We think evangelizing is for the lost and broken and beaten off the path. They are..no doubt. But the invitation is for EVERYONE. One day, all the nations will bow and one day, all tongues will confess Jesus is Lord. Until that day...why am I waiting around. I gotta start inviting people to the party.

Mark 9:2-29

Jesus transfigures himself in front of Peter, James, and John. Now I don't know what transfigures means..but I can only think of the Power Rangers (sadly...). But I guess that's still a sight to see. To see something that's kinda raggedy, maybe bruised and tired turn into something like WHAM BAM CLEAN PURE. The scripture (ESV) says "intensely white, as no one on earth could bleach them." I imagine Oxyclean over and over again and still can't compare. It just shows how radiant Jesus is and He promises that same whiteness when our sins are deemed clean and forgiven. I'm not sure what heaven will look like or what we'll even look like, but I know it's gonna be bright as no other. Pretty cool.

Jesus also heals a boy stricken w a demon because the boy's father has great faith in Jesus' ability. I like the end when the disciples are like...what..why couldn't we do that. And Jesus responds with "this kind cannot be driven out by anything but prayer." I think that's a pretty clear, direct answer to how we should deal with our problems and miracle-beggings. Pray. Pray with passion. Pray with faith.

2.Corinthians.5.17

2012: Desiring God

Man, it's been more than a year since my last blog. I miss the days where I had time just to express my thoughts and experiences. It's a sad thing once you graduate and start to work...there seems to be no time for anything. But alas, here we are in 2012. A new year, a new start. I praise the Almighty God for bringing me this far in life. He is a kind, just, loving God who has provided a lot of joys and sufferings that I never really counted in 2011, so I don't want to make that mistake this year.

This blog will be decided this year to my daily devotions. Nothing fancy. Nothing elaborate. Just my thoughts on what I read each day (hopefully daily). The goal is not to express thought-provoking or insightful. The goal is to build a habit to read and to jot down whatever the Spirit compels. Since I've struggled the last 23 1/2 yrs of reading the Bible, I'll try this and see if it works. I'll start with reading for 5-10 mins and then write for 5-10 mins. Once the time is up, it's up. I hope to increase the time each month and hopefully I'll read for hours without wanting to stop. My desire for the year is to pursue God with all my heart, to build habits that make me yearn for wisdom and truth, and to ultimately equip myself better to share the Gospel. Time is a precious thing. I hope I do not waste my time here on Earth on myself. May God be glorified each and every day. Amen.

Mark 8:31-9:1

A good reminder that many times man just thinks about man. Makes sense to me since we are man, but at the same time, we shouldn't be satisfied to think as man. If I'm striving to know Christ and be like Christ...then I should think like Christ. I like how Jesus rebukes Peter saying he doesn't have in mind the concerns of God but merely humans (v33). Makes me wonder what my real concerns are. Are they only for man? Or for God? I do concern about work, relationships, day-to-day stuff...I guess that's pretty worldly. I guess I only think about God's concerns on the weekends when I'm in fellowship with a biblical community. That's pretty sad. I hope I can desire more time during the weekdays.

"What good is it for you to gain the whole, world, yet forfeit your soul? Or what can you give in exchange for your soul."